Sick
Lousy day.  I have a virus.  When my friends get sick they all seem to catch  colds and feel fine in a couple of days. When I get sick it turns into a major production and I am out of work for days. Not fair.

I called my ex-husband (well, we are separated) and asked him to bring me some groceries. He took pity on me and agreed but refused to enter my house. He also threatened to spray paint the word "unclean" on my front door.

Everyone's a comedian. Just because I'm a little drippy, well, okay, very drippy, and am considering buying stock in a tissue company is no reason to make fun of me.